+ = - Banana Brot

Colors in the park & I'm a wrench. Built to build but I cannot build other wrenches so my greater purpose is not great & my meaning is mean to me.

When you fall in the woods you cann appreciate the ground. You are barely over it & so close to being under it.

I wore my teeth as mouth necklaces all summer long.

When they were passing out disasters in heaven he didn't take one. The rest of us went through the line multiple times because we foolishly thought it was noble.

He had an app that scanned his surroundings & pulled up user reviews of everything in existence. Yet he still didn't trust a soul.

It is customary in some non-Tuvaluan cultures for the parents of the bride to put a wedge in-between the bride & groom, a grapefruit wedge. This was the only way Maori businesswomen could sell any fruit because in Piemerican Ecuador you can pick fruit for free provided you have arms or toes.

Gnell learned how to fry an egg on her back porch. She got strange looks for having a porch attached to her shoulders.

1 million people a day bathe in onions. They are the tiny people we eat but never see.

In evolutionism stew made Stu. In creationion Stu made you but later changed His name to Jesus.

Deserts have trees but when you are not looking invisible palm trees eat all of the other trees, roots & all.

I bought some apple sauce at the store the other day. It tasted redundant eating it on my apples. It was like buying ketchup sauce for catsup. What a scam!

Toonairy had a terrible dirt hoarding problem but no one ever noticed because he kept it all under his house in his secret cavern.

He wasn't your ordinary man made of ice that can only digest fire. No, there were no ordinary guys like that. When he goes out to dinner he has to have you throw liquid nitrogen on him every time he takes a bite. And he can't bite because his teeth melt. He fasts as long as he can but everytime he eats his shape changes dramatically. I've never seen a guy like him, not even him.

You:  We lived near each other.
Me:  No... where?
You:  Near each other.
Me:  No.
You:  One Four
Me:  Two Love
You:  Street
Me:  Not there. You were never home.
You:  You saw me!
Me:  Yes & you were never home.
You:  You're right. I never LIVED near you.

Your Butler:  There are some men here for you madam.
You Are A Woman:  Tell them I was never here & they were never men.
Your Butler:  Gentlemen you were never here & she was never a woman.
Some Men (You're probably one of them):  What is this fiction?
Your Pretend Butler:  But of course.
Some Pretend Men:  But if this is fiction how can we trust you?
Your Pretend Butler (who is retiring in 3 weeks):  You can't because you were never here.
Some Pretend Men (minus 1):  But are you here?
Your Pretend Butler:  Not for long because this is the last line of the script. Some Pretend Men:  We'll see about that! Your Pretend Butler:  Oh my, someone has been misoperating the carriage return.

Toasters are where toasts have their funerals. Our butter & plates are their afterlife.

He was a true Renaissance man. The kind that chefs made salads for.

Hippie Teacher (who has field trips to teach in the forest):  Aristotle didn't have electricity & he turned out fine.
Stu Dent:  How do you know he didn't turn into a weredolphin at night since there were no lights?
Hippie Teacher:  He did but becoming a weredolphin is the noblest cause in human history.
Stu Ding:  I am bad at recycling. Should I just wrap myself in trash like a mummy to replace my clothes?
Hippie Teacher:  Yes but not banana peels. Banana's are our true DNA half-brothers.
Sue Skrach:  Since pollution will destroy the world why don't we crash into cars until there aren't any cars anymore?
Hippie Teacher:  Because one of those people we auto-murder could end up coming up with a cure for step-mother Earth.
Freddy Flattyre:  What do you mean step-mother earth?
Hippie Teacher:  We're all originally from the planet Tetrionfour but our dad, Time, got a divorce & now we live on step-mother Earth. This is why we have so many natural disasters. Step-mother just cannot love us as much as mummy did. (Sheds a single tear from each eye then wipes them). This is also why bananas are the true sons of Earth.
Ted Enthetrunk:  What happened to daddy Time?
Hippie Teacher:  He died. Now there is no time.
Olivia Brokenpassengersidemirror:  Then when is this happening?
Hippie Teacher:  It isn't. Now there is no more time for questions.
All (The Complete Car):  Now there is no time at all.