Very Poor Man's March - Lesson Leftovers

You know you're poor if the closest you've ever been to an airplane is when they were dropping off crates of food for your people.

You know you're poor when your tricycle is a bicycle.

You know you're poor when you look for products that will help you go bald so you can save money on haircuts.

You know you're poor when the closest you've ever been to an airport is that hole in a manhole cover.

You know you're poor when you can't afford mustard on your sandwich even though it is free of charge.

You are poor if on your 16th birthday instead of a car your parents got a you a job.

You know you're poor if the only musical instrument you've ever owned was a triangle made out of a medical syringe & a paper clip bent into a passable triangle.

You know you're poor when you eat off your license plate.

You know you're poor when you save used corn cobs to use as hair brushes.

You know you're poor when your breakfast isn't fruity peddles, its just pebbles & your teeth go "Bam! Bam!" as they break.

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You know you're poor if, instead of eating fast food, you eat snails, the slowest food there is!

You know you're poor if you eat your oranges peel & all, just calling it natural marmalade.

You know you're poor when your cell phone is made out of radishes because radishes have cells right?

You know you're poor when your water hose ain't nothin' but an air hose.

You know you're poor when city hall comes & condemns your bath tub.

You know you live in a poor city when at the border the road stops having pavement & just has a sign that says, "Meant to be paved."

You know you're poor if the only time you've been on a golf course was to hunt the geese there to have something to eat that night.

You know you're poor if the only meal you eat in the winter is chilly, not chili the food but chilly the frosty air.

You know you're poor if need glasses but all you can afford is white plastics. They don't call you 4 eyes, they call you no eyes.

You know you're poor when the only thing you can do to save more money is to flush less.

You know you're poor when you support illiteracy campaigns because books cost too much money.

You know you're poor when you lose weight just so your kids can give you their clothes as hand me downs.

You know you're poor when your bed is a flower bed in your neighbor's yard & your only blanket is the stars.

You know you're poor when you gather up the hay people decorate with in the fall to have something to sleep on.

You know you're poor when look for open graves to sleep in because rustled dirt is much more comfy than unrustled dirt.

You know you're poor when putting your best foot forward requires you gettin it out of the case first.

You know you're poor when your backyard & your frontyard are the same yard because you don't have a house on your land.

You know you're poor when you show up to JC Penny hoping to buy whatever you want & they're like, "You're crazy." And you're like "Doesn't JC Penny stand for Jesus Christ Penny. I know Jesus I've got a penny how come I can't have whatever I want in this store?"

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You know you're poor if the only Christmas tree you've ever had was made of twigs with pine cones tied to them using blades of grass because you couldn't even afford tape.

You know you're poor if the way you get haircuts is by rubbin' grease on your head & just lettin' the animals in the woods chew your hair off.

You know you're poor when you went to a school where the math books were also history books because they were written before anyone know what the heck math was.

You know you're poor when instead of having a toy 18 wheeler you just had a 1 wheeler made out of a matchbox & a tainted Cheerio. Because you gotta eat those untainted ones.

You know you're poor when your first box of crayons ain't got no crayons in it, it was just a box.

You know you're poor when the only doctor you've ever seen is the one that guesses weight at the fair.

You know you're poor when your favorite hat is a cloud.

Read Poor Man's March Lessons